29 Aug How To Survive Twins -One Mom’s Story
Today, I get to share a story. A story where peace of mind was restored and a growing family is thriving. It is best said in our client’s words and I think you’ll be able to relate to many things in her story.
“Expectations. Predictability. Routine. Three of my favorite words. Usually these three words result in another set of three words that I love just as much; peace, health, contentedness.
They lead me to my feelings of a sunset sail with a golden pink sky backdrop…
…And now think, screaming baby… TIMES TWO. Abrupt transition, yes? This is what I felt in my OB’s office last year when he said, ‘Yup, that’s definitely two…it’s twins! How do you feel!?’ Jolt. As bewilderment, with a hint of intimidation, washed over me, I said, ‘Uh, I’m okay. This is exciting?’
With my husband at the beginning of a new deployment and our almost three-year old at home, this amount of change was…BIG. So, when the haze of the first trimester lifted, practical thoughts returned to my mind, turning into worry and fear. How I was going to manage two infants and a three year old. What on earth was I going to do? Our families are awesome, but on the other end of the country.
Turning to Google, my search words started with ‘having twins, need help’ to ‘how to survive twins’ and then more emphatically ‘how am I going to survive twins!?!’, which didn’t get me anywhere – except awful chat rooms about twins who slept on completely opposite schedules for the first three years.
Then, a little brainstorming with my mom helped me decide that some kind of professional support would be needed, and ideally at night. I instinctually knew that this is what would help me be able to function during the day, and that this would be crucial.
I began asking people I knew, about any contacts with baby nurses or night nannies. I called nanny agencies. And I came up short each place I looked. Going back to Google with more specific terminology and synonyms, I hoped to find the magic combination of words pointing to: ‘click here, this is the perfect person for you’. And in a way, that’s exactly what ended up happening. Enter Doulas Northwest.
I still remember that morning, when I reached Kristyn on the phone. I briefly described my situation and she reassured me immediately that she could help. I remember her saying, ‘Yes, I can help you with that.’
And my stress began to melt away.
She explained what a postpartum & infant care doula is -basically, an angel-mother-friend all rolled into one, with the latest knowledge and info as you learn how to care for your baby (that’s my definition anyway).
We scheduled a time for Kristyn to come over and discussed her services more. She asked us about our needs and helped us strategize some initial twin logistics. My stress level continued to decrease. Choosing to hire Doulas Northwest became the obvious decision and we didn’t hesitate to reserve our place on their calendar, months before our babies were due. Throughout the rest of my high risk pregnancy Kristyn kept in regular contact with me, offering her encouraging expertise and an excellent perspective -pulling me out of the medical lingo and statistics which had been overwhelming.
When our beautiful, healthy babies were born, we found that much of the ‘advice’ we received by those in the hospital was discouraging. So many comments about how much work they would be. But I wish I could speak with those ‘well-wishers’ now, and give them an update! Because actually, I could not disagree with them more.
It may be hard to believe, but my twins have felt EASIER than my first child. Doulas Northwest has helped my transition from singleton mom to twin mom be much smoother than it otherwise would have been.
Our entire family has felt it.
Getting a full night’s sleep on a regular basis after a twin pregnancy and during c-section recovery was what my mind, body and soul needed.
I was more present during the day and able to get to know my babies in a joyful way.
Each night that our Doula came, I was able to talk about the challenges of the day and seek advice about what to try next. Just knowing there was someone, an expert, I could talk to at the end of the day made each frustrating moment or potential melt-down less intense.
Remember those words I opened with; expectations, predictability, and routine? I would have never thought they would play any part in my reality with twins. However, with consistent help from Doulas Northwest, and the strategies we worked on together, they are indeed part of our reality.
Working as a team, we have EXPECTATIONS, we have introduced a ROUTINE and are experiencing PREDICTABILITY as the twins approach 5 months. I am at a place where I feel empowered to parent all of my children (solo sometimes -military) and I know I always have someone to call when bumps in the road arise in the future. So although it seems unlikely, it’s true that even with a toddler and infant twins, there ARE many moments of PEACE, HEALTH and CONTENTEDNESS in our home. Doulas Northwest has played a large part in making that unlikely dream a reality.”
~K.B, Doulas Northwest client. Mother to one dynamic 3 year old, and almost 6 month old twins.
Postpartum & Infant Care Doula; Infant Feeding Specialist; Placenta Services
Seattle | Tacoma | JBLM | Olympia